C'est La Vie

We all make decisions in our life that affect our friends, family and work. One of the biggest decisions I have recently made was to continue my education. I am working full time and going to grad school part time through WVU. Wake up, go to work and sit in front of the computer for 8 hours. Drive home, eat dinner, sit in front of the computer some more. Finally, it is time for bed. Doesn’t my life sound like fun? Juggling a full time job and grad school does not leave a whole lot of time to do much else. Moreover, my grad program is all online. Needless to say my laptop and I have grown very close - it rarely leaves my side.

Many people have a hard time getting back into the routine of schoolwork after being away from it for so long. With me, it had only been a few years but I was still feeling overwhelmed and struggled with the logistics of writing papers. It was as if I had forgotten all I learned in my English classes. I became concerned with what laid ahead. Luckily, I got in the hang of writing again and realized it can be done, I can do this! The trick is really to balance things out. An important lesson I have learned is to stay on top of assignments. Procrastination will get you in trouble and make it hard to manage a social life, or really, just life in general. Stay focused, do not get into a rhythm and start to relax, it may get you in trouble.

Do you have reservations about starting something you may not be able to finish or that you are taking on too much at once? I have learned to enjoy the experience, absorb it rather than focus on only the end goal. School is hard work but it can also be a good time. I like to think of all the knowledge I have been able to share and put to use at work.

My advice to anyone looking to go back to school while working full time is to choose a program geared toward working adults, stick to a plan for dividing your time and ask for help from your professors, work and family. It is most important to have a support system; whether it is your spouse or family. If you have a family, I suggest talking with your spouse and explain the journey ahead. It will not be easy to juggle work and school while being a mom or dad, but in the end, the final result will benefit you and your family. There will be many nights where your husband or wife will be frustrated having to take on more household responsibilities. It is best to avoid all of the surprises by laying this out on the table beforehand. Make sure that it will be manageable as a family unit and that all parties are aware of the sacrifices which must be made.

With my graduate program all online, it has left me the challenge of forcing myself to sit down, do schoolwork and plan life around it. It is quite the learning experience but it does have many benefits and I am sure that I will be more disciplined and a better planner because of it. So for anyone who is deciding to go back to school, do it already! GOODLUCK! As far as big life decisions go, sometimes it is easy to lose sight of the end goal, but stick with it because it will be well worth it.

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The Quest for Organization

This past Saturday, I drove six hours round trip to Columbus to buy shelving for my storage-deficient kitchen. Now, I know that shelving is available in many stores that are only minutes from me, but I still woke up before the sun on a Saturday to make this trip.

Why? Well, a couple of reasons. I bought it from The Container Store and the Columbus store is the closest to Pittsburgh. I have purchased this particular brand of shelving before and I like it. I worked for The Container Store for almost 6 years while living in Illinois. And the shelving was on sale!

While I didn't do any research, I probably could have purchased this exact same thing at a much closer store and saved the gas money. I could have even had it delivered if I chose. Again, cheaper than the gas. But I actually wanted to go. Thus began my journey to visit a store that I had never been too, but was so familiar.

The Container Store, or more specifically the people I met while working there, was a big part of my life - fellow employees and customers alike. Have you ever hugged a salesperson while shopping? Me either. But I have been hugged by a customer after designing her closet one New Year's Eve. Several years later while designing a closet, another customer and I started chatting about Ireland. She had been and I want to go. When she picked up her order a couple of days later, she left a note for me with information on where to stay and what to do if I ever made it to Ireland.

Of course, my co-workers became like family. We would play trivia on Sunday nights at TGIFridays and were completely loud and obnoxious. They threw me the best going-away party right before I moved to Pennsylvania. We just had a lot of fun together, inside and outside the walls of the store.

Although retail is not a career I would ever want to pursue, it was a fun job with fun people. So that is why I drove all that way to buy shelving. And to be honest, I would do it again. Although next time, I want to go during Gift Wrap Wonderland. If you like gift wrap, and expensive gift wrap at that, then you should definitely visit The Container Store around the holidays. Or shop online and save yourself the gas money.

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The Marines

This past weekend I had the honor of being in my husband's cousin's wedding. Her and I are wonderful friends and have been since my husband and I first started to date. A fellow Marine of my husbands was lucky enough to be the groom (I say it like I picked him out of a crowd) and so other Marines were invited to the wedding. It was such a great time, however this story is not about the wedding, but instead, about the Marines.

My husband and I met in college about a year after he had returned from his deployment overseas with the Marine Corps. He still had a couple of years left in his contract, so I had the pleasure of getting to become friends with some of his comrades. Let's just say they are all unique. I could go on and on with hilarious stories, but this posting is to tell you about the love of a Marine, and no, not towards me or the bride, but for each other. And not the Don't Ask, Don't Tell type of love either.

At the wedding, two full rows of pews were filled with Marines in their dress blues, looking as sharp as ever and the groom stood tall in his at the alter marrying the woman of his dreams. Directly after the ceremony, I watched all of the Marines walk outside and stand in formation waiting to do a ceremonial sword detail when the bride and groom walked out. It gave me the chills.

These Marines range anywhere in age from 21 to no older than 30 I would guess, who have been through a war and have seen all kinds of things that some don't even speak of. But what brought them together on Saturday's wedding was love.

There are all kinds of male groups that you could argue have great times together, whether it be the frat guys, sports guys or what have you, but I guarantee you have never met a more brotherly group of guys until you have met a group of Marines. They care for each other, through thick and thin, even though they may not have seen each other for weeks, months or some even years. At the reception, they all acted like it was just yesterday they were all together going through probably the hardest times of their lives.

I know my husband will make fun of me for this post, but he and his Marines have formed a bond that I am sometimes jealous about. I haven't been through what they have with any of my girlfriends and they will tell you nothing will come close to it either. Seeing them all together this weekend really brought the feeling of thankfulness that they are still with us, for their service and for their love. Because if a Marine didn't love, we would not be where we are today.

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Yeah...You Are Pretty Damn Great!

I was talking with a friend the other day about positive reinforcement when it comes to my kids. I have been getting away from it lately because my oldest has been such a handful. In talking with her, I realized I needed to take a step back and compliment what he was doing right instead of constantly harping on his mischievous and bad behaviors.

The conversation went on and she asked me if I positively reinforce myself.  I said of course....wine, chocolate, shopping! Oh, she meant through my words.  I replied "of course not." She told me that Lady Gaga muses for five minutes a day (though apparently she was instructed to do 15 minutes a day) on positive self-talk. I was surprised that someone who is at the top of their game and wildly successful need such a technique. Even if you can't stand Lady Gaga, her confidence and character are something to be admired.

I started thinking, how could I start doing this for myself? Though on the outside, I may seem content and confident and ready for anything, inside, I'm still a teenager afraid of being accepted. A little girl who wants to be chosen first, not last. A worker who makes mistakes. A mother and wife who speculates every day if I'm doing right by my family. A person who wonders all the time how I can be better.

As it turns out, I am my own worst enemy.  I look for validation from those around me and rarely get what I'm looking for. So instead of looking outside, I've decided to look in.  What can I tell myself daily, even for five minutes, that would enable me to let go of a little of the "failure" and settle on the "good enough"?

I challenge you to take five minutes next time you are alone (in the car, sitting in traffic, drying your hair) and tell yourself:
I am pretty
I am smart
I am a good mom/wife/friend
I don't need to keep up with the Jones'
I am my own person
I am capable....

You see where this is going.  You know how you feel after a complement from a colleague or family member, how do you feel when it comes from you? From the one person who has to live with you 24 hours a day, seven days a week?

Can't find the time everyday to check in with yourself? Write yourself a note, such as "you're great!" and put it somewhere and forget about it.  When you find it, weeks or months later, like that $20 in your skinny jeans, you will smile and be reminded that yeah, you are pretty damn great!

~ Kel

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A Working Wife and Her Passion for Beer!

So I’m one of the working wives of this crazy blog group and what I really LOVE to talk and write about is beer.  I’m extremely passionate about it and some people might think that my passion is unhealthy but, it’s not… trust me! 

Almost five years ago, my husband and I embarked on a scary adventure together.  We purchased a bar and restaurant here in Pittsburgh and three weeks later we got married.  The timing really didn’t work in our favor but it was what it was and it was a wild year.  The bar was turn-key which meant that we got married and just started working and because I had no experience in the service industry, I was the decorator trying to get the place to look how he wanted.  I also had a full-time job (what I like to refer to as my “ big girl job”) as a marketing coordinator which required me to travel a lot and I was taking care of everything at home.  Once the decorating gig was done…I was kind of done.  I wasn’t a bartender or waitress nor could I just sit down there every night till the wee hours of the morning because I had to get up and work.  This was his dream and I started to resent him because he was never home.  He started resenting me because I wasn’t interested in the bar.  After two years of non-stop fighting, I really thought that my marriage was over.  I was sad and hurt because I loved this man.  Then it hit us…we had to help each other.  I needed to be more involved in the business and he needed to help out more at home.  Most importantly, we had to make time for each other.

So what does this all have to do with me loving beer?  Well, one of the first things my husband and I started to do together was review the beers that were coming in and out of the bar.  We have 16 taps and about 170 bottles.  We started to work together to determine what beers should stay and go and what seasonal beers we should get.  He started to teach me a lot about beer and what the difference is between a craft beer and a microbrew.  Then I learned how to be a server and realized that my knowledge of beer wasn’t enough and I needed to learn more and quickly.  Why?  Customers would ask me questions like “What’s similar to a Blue Moon?” or “What’s your favorite beer?”  I couldn’t answer those questions and I thought it was sad that I didn’t even know what my favorite beer was.  So I started trying them and in that process, I started a beer blog for our bar.  I’m not only learning how to answer customer questions, but I’m learning about malts, hops and if I think the beer is balanced or not.  I can detect hints of citrus or nutmeg and it’s all very exciting.  I find myself talking to customers all the time about beer and after just a short year of doing this, I’ve kind of become the beer expert at the bar. 

I’m now involved in all facets of our business.  I’m part-time at my “big girl job” and my marriage is better than ever.   So, when it’s my turn to blog, don’t be surprised if I’m rambling on and on about beer.  I just love it and I dare you to go out and try what I’m talking about!  And for all those married couples out there…communicate, communicate, communicate!

PS:  My favorite beer of all time…Tröegs Mad Elf Ale.  My favorite beer right now…Southern Tier Pumpking (especially delicious when warm).

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Silver Lining

As I sat here trying to come up with a title for this blog, a number of ideas ran through my mind – Determination, Second Chance, THIRD Chance… I finally settled on the above.
For those of you who don’t know me very well, horses are a HUGE part of my life – my life revolves around them. I’m addicted. I’m addicted to the atmosphere of the barn, the smell of hay, the feeling I get after a flawless hunter trip, and the thrill of the speed, power and energy as we gallop up the cinder road. I need it, I crave it, and without it, I’m not who I “really” am.
I recently came across this post:
From time to time, people tell me, “lighten up, it’s just a horse,” or, “that’s a lot of money for just a horse.” They don’t understand the distance traveled, the time spent, or the costs involved for “just a horse.” Some of my proudest moments have come about with “just a horse.” Many hours have passed and my only company was “just a horse,” but I did not once feel slighted. Some of my saddest moments have been brought about by “just a horse” and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch of “just a horse” gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day. If you, too, think it’s “just a horse,” then you will probably understand phrases like “just a friend,” “just a sunrise,” or “just a promise.” “Just a horse” brings into my life the very essence of friendship, trust, and pure unbridled joy. “Just a horse” brings out the compassion and patience that makes me a better person. Because of “just a horse” I will rise early, take long walks and look longingly to the future. So for me and folks like me, it’s not “just a horse” but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future, the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment. “Just a horse” brings out what’s good in me and diverts my thoughts away from myself and the worries of the day. I hope that someday they can understand that it’s not “just a horse” but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being “just a human.” So the next time you hear the phrase “just a horse,” just smile, because they “just don’t understand.”
For me, truer words have never been spoken.
The last two weeks have been rough. My show horse had an accident out in the field, which resulted in her losing her eye. This horse has overcome more in her life by the age of six than most humans will in their entire lives. In addition to this recent incident, she spent almost a year of her life in and out of hospitals in surgeries for a sinus issues. Overcoming that issue was a miracle in itself. I adore her – she never gave up.
She is one of the most talented and smart horses I have ever had the privilege to ride. Our personalities are very similar. We “get” each other. She is hardworking, sweet, challenging, quirky and athletic. She is NOT “just a horse.”
Last night I had my first ride back on her since she lost her eye – the vets told us “Don’t count her out.” We didn’t.
Despite her new handicap and change in appearance, nothing has changed about this horse – she is still hardworking, sweet, challenging, quirky and athletic – everything I loved about her from the beginning.
She doesn’t know what she looks like now. And although I’m sure her views on life have changed (literally), she doesn’t care. She may not have a career as a top show horse, but she will be a great teacher, a great trail horse and a great momma (when we breed her next year). Her handicap isn’t reducing her quality of life, just changing her job up a little.
A horse, teaching me how to overcome obstacles, have determination and reminding me that every cloud has a silver lining. Sometimes I forget that – we all do.

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That's What She Fed

No need to make dinner reservations. Grab the candles and flowers and woo your sweetheart.

Cooking at your place has many benefits:

-It's cheaper than going out, especially with this economy
-It's an interactive alternative to dining out
-When the meal is done, he/she is already at your place (haha)

You'll score points with this delicious crab cake recipe served with sriracha dipping sauce.

But first, what is sriracha? Sriracha is made from sun ripen chilies which are ground into a smooth paste along with garlic. It is excellent in soups, sauces, hot dogs, hamburgers or anything else to give it a delicious, spicy taste.
*sriracha can be found in your local grocery store's international food section.

What you'll need:
Crabcakes
1 can crab meat
1/2 cup sweet red peppers
1/2 cup finely chopped onions
1 egg, beaten
1 teaspoon old bay seasoning
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1/3 cup crushed crackers
1/4 cup mayo
1/4 lemon, juiced
Vegetable or olive oil
Salt, to taste
1 cup bread crumbs

Sriracha Dipping Sauce
Fresh lemon juice
1/2 cup mayo
Sriracha

Directions:

Sriracha Dipping Sauce: Simply combine mayo and sriracha sauce. Adjust hotness by adding more of sriracha as needed. Add a little bit of fresh lemon juice, but be sure not to add too much or it will make it watery. Place in fridge to set until crab cakes are done cooking.

Crab cakes: In a large bowl, mix together all crab cake ingredients, except for the bread crumbs and oil. Shape into patties and dip both side in bread crumbs.

Heat oil in a large skillet over medium heat. When oil is hot, carefully place crab cakes, in batches, in pan and fry until browned, about 4 to 5 minutes. Carefully flip crab cakes and fry on other side until golden brown. Serve warm with sriracha dipping sauce.

Pair this with any sides of your choice and a delicious bottle of wine. My favorite is Chateau Ste. Michelle's Riesling. Oh yeah, and don't forget dessert!

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