From Bachelorette to Working Wife

Welp, it’s over. A year and a half worth of planning, and it’s over. And honesty, I feel like I can breathe again. Bittersweet.

Do I ‘feel’ different ? Maybe a little. I’m just finally complete. It’s awesome, knowing you will be with someone forever. And who better to spend forever with than my best friend?

Love is a crazy thing… One day, you are playing mini golf as friends, and the next thing you know, you are so head-over-heels in love, they are all you think about every day. The kind of I-can’t-wait-for-this-work-day-to-end-to-see-you kind of love. I have this love. Not to say that the new, shiny ring around my finger validates what I feel in my heart, but as our minister said at the ceremony, it’s a symbol. We are complete. We don’t belong to each other, we belong with each other.

August 31, 2012, was and will always be one of the most memorable days of my life, filled with so much love and support from 300 friends and family.

Best.Day.Ever.

Perfection doesn’t even begin to describe it. Everything just fell into place. All my worrying, panic attacks, terrible dreams were for not. We pulled it off. We put together an amazing day to share with amazing people. And it was perfect.

Nick and I have been blessed with two of the most loving and supportive families. We have them to thank for being such incredible role models and providing us with prime examples of what true love is and should be.

30 years from now, I imagine my feelings will be no different. I am complete. I can breathe. I can take on the rest of my life with my best friend - new experiences and adventures to look forward to as husband and wife. (A week and a half later, I am certainly not used to the word Husband or being called Mrs. Irvine).

A new chapter… I am now a Working Wife!

ps - if you want to see some photos, visit Elizabeth Cayton Photography for a sneak peek! She will be adding more soon!

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on StumbleUpon Share on Delicious Share on Reddit

Share on Digg Share on simpy Share on Technorati Share on furl Subscribe to Feeds RSS

50 Shades of Reality

Someone bugged me the other day about my Prelude to 50 post and asked where the actual 50 Shades of Grey post was. I finished the books, so it fell off my radar. My self-diagnosed ADD has a way of doing that. If it isn’t in front of me, happening right now, I tend to forget and move on. Unless it is on a list, in which case I will tend to it because I have to cross said item off. But I digress.

I read 50 Shades of Grey. Being a long-time lover of literature and classics and an avid reader, I avoid fan fiction. One, I pretend that my not-so-sophisticated self is better than mediocre writing.  That coming from someone who has never written nor published a book! Two, I prefer non-fiction to most any other type of writing. Three, and most truthfully, I don’t want to HAVE to read more than one of anything. One book, wrapped up by the end, all nice and neat.

With all of that being said, I read all three. I got sucked in. I actually took my time because I didn’t want the books to end! Though my husband benefited, ahem, from me reading the books, he also paid a price.

The books focus so much on the physical, just-met-you, wanna-do-everything-to-make-you-happy, crazy-in-love, can’t-keep-my-hands-or-mind-off-of-you, it makes the reader yearn for that again. The sweet email saying you miss them. The random flowers for no reason. The just-between-you-and-me comment or compliment. The I-have-to-be-next-to-you-always feeling. After 13 years, two babies, multiple degrees, houses and jobs, that goes away. And, in reading the books made me very, very sad.

Let me preface this with—my husband and I have a wonderful relationship. One that neither of us takes for granted. We work VERY hard at keeping things together, when, if you knew our personal situation and setbacks, would and have ruined many relationships. However, I still pined for that “just started dating” feeling again with him. I wanted some of that back. So I talked to him. We each tried a bit harder to hold hands, kiss each other for no reason, tell one another daily why we love each other. I even made a sign for our bathroom that said “I love you because….” and put it in a picture frame. Each day we would write back and forth in dry erase marker to one another what we loved.

I was a little less sad about what slowly changed throughout the last 13 years. Until I realized, and I guess I knew this, but never articulated it, even in my own mind, that what we have worked for and sacrificed for and built and created together is so much more awesome than merely having googly eyes for each other or not being able to keep our hands off of one another.

Mitt Romney’s wife recently said “We don’t have a storybook marriage, we have a real marriage.” True or not for them, it’s a good point. Story book relationships are just that, story book, made up, ficticious. Maybe this is why I typically read non-fiction. Reality is so much better than make believe!

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on StumbleUpon Share on Delicious Share on Reddit

Share on Digg Share on simpy Share on Technorati Share on furl Subscribe to Feeds RSS

The Single Girl's Valentine's Day

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. As a single girl, I should be sad that I don't have someone to be my valentine. But I don't feel that way. Would it be nice? Sure, but such is life. I like Valentine's Day. Maybe because it is a little bright spot in a cold, dreary winter.

Those singles out there who are completely opposed to Valentine's Day can rest assured that an alternative option is offered - Singles Awareness Day or Singles Appreciation Day. In addition to the holiday name change, people can wear green or black to go against the grain of wearing red. Or you can completely ignore the holiday all together.

The thing that I don't like about these alternatives is that it makes people who are single look bitter. There may be some single people who are extremely bitter that they don't have a significant other to share this Hallmark holiday with, but why share your bitterness with everyone. A person's happiness shouldn't be dependent on a relationship status.

So instead of feeling terrible about being alone, do something special for yourself. Get a pedicure, go out to dinner with friends, watch a good movie, share your love with your parents, siblings, friends, whoever! It is just one day...and this too shall pass!

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on StumbleUpon Share on Delicious Share on Reddit

Share on Digg Share on simpy Share on Technorati Share on furl Subscribe to Feeds RSS

Do What You Love ~ Love What You Do

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on." ~Steve Jobs.

We have heard so many times how bad our economy is and it is sad that so many people are struggling to find work. As a recent graduate (and yes I still say recent because I am now not counting my bachelors and am only counting my masters), I understand their struggle to find love in what you do.

Although, I can't really complain. I have a great job, work with a lovely group of girls as you can all tell, and really do enjoy the work that I do. However, I guarentee if you ask any one of us if we ever planned to work in this particular industry, I am sure the answer would be no. We all wanted to be on tv, work for a huge publication or some awesome name brand that EVERYONE knows about. Or maybe not, but atleast that was one of my goals.

Remember when someone asked you when you were little, "what do you want to be when you grow up?" Did you say an astronaut? Well hopefully not since NASA conducted its last space shuttle standing in July. Now it is going private and who knows how many people will get to live that dream. Did you say a teacher? Very rewarding career, but those graduating with a teaching degree are having difficulties finding a teaching position that pays a decent wage. Many schools have had to cut back on spending, meaning less pay for great work. A doctor? Cool - go ahead and be in school for five plus more years on top of the 12 years you already spent in school. And let's not even go there with how much school even costs!

What did you say you wanted to be? Is it still possible you could be that or even are that? I wanted to be a veterinarian because of my love for my first dog, Max. Obviously I did not pursue that dream because I decided I really didn't like science, but I still love my dogs. But as I got older and saw more possibilities, my mind changed and now I am pursueing a new dream.

What about love. Did you envision a fairy tell wedding with a big, puffy, white dress and a huge cake? Or were you like me, panicking because if I got married on a Saturday I was sure to have a soccer game that day so it was inevitable that I would have to wear my soccer uniform under my wedding dress. Not to even mention that I didn't even like wearing dresses at that age. Let's just say I didn't get married on a Saturday, and I did not wear my soccer uniform under my not-so-puffy, but still white, wedding dress. Things change.

The point is, all has changed since we were little and can still change now that we are older. You don't have to settle for work, for love, for anything. Your mind can be changed over and over again. Fall in love, maybe three or four times, before you find Mr. Perfect that you can imagine being with for the rest of your life. Go through five, six, seven jobs before you are in a position that you are comfortable with and know you can succeed in, be happy in, and love going to work every day for. Most of all, dream for what the future will bring you. We can't predict what our lives will be like in 10, 20, or even 50 years. We don't have a clue what kind of world we will be living in. But you can always live in the moment, and trust me, that moment can just keep getting better and better.

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on StumbleUpon Share on Delicious Share on Reddit

Share on Digg Share on simpy Share on Technorati Share on furl Subscribe to Feeds RSS

The Marines

This past weekend I had the honor of being in my husband's cousin's wedding. Her and I are wonderful friends and have been since my husband and I first started to date. A fellow Marine of my husbands was lucky enough to be the groom (I say it like I picked him out of a crowd) and so other Marines were invited to the wedding. It was such a great time, however this story is not about the wedding, but instead, about the Marines.

My husband and I met in college about a year after he had returned from his deployment overseas with the Marine Corps. He still had a couple of years left in his contract, so I had the pleasure of getting to become friends with some of his comrades. Let's just say they are all unique. I could go on and on with hilarious stories, but this posting is to tell you about the love of a Marine, and no, not towards me or the bride, but for each other. And not the Don't Ask, Don't Tell type of love either.

At the wedding, two full rows of pews were filled with Marines in their dress blues, looking as sharp as ever and the groom stood tall in his at the alter marrying the woman of his dreams. Directly after the ceremony, I watched all of the Marines walk outside and stand in formation waiting to do a ceremonial sword detail when the bride and groom walked out. It gave me the chills.

These Marines range anywhere in age from 21 to no older than 30 I would guess, who have been through a war and have seen all kinds of things that some don't even speak of. But what brought them together on Saturday's wedding was love.

There are all kinds of male groups that you could argue have great times together, whether it be the frat guys, sports guys or what have you, but I guarantee you have never met a more brotherly group of guys until you have met a group of Marines. They care for each other, through thick and thin, even though they may not have seen each other for weeks, months or some even years. At the reception, they all acted like it was just yesterday they were all together going through probably the hardest times of their lives.

I know my husband will make fun of me for this post, but he and his Marines have formed a bond that I am sometimes jealous about. I haven't been through what they have with any of my girlfriends and they will tell you nothing will come close to it either. Seeing them all together this weekend really brought the feeling of thankfulness that they are still with us, for their service and for their love. Because if a Marine didn't love, we would not be where we are today.

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on StumbleUpon Share on Delicious Share on Reddit

Share on Digg Share on simpy Share on Technorati Share on furl Subscribe to Feeds RSS